Friday, March 14, 2008

"Looks like a couple of scientists gone off the deep end to me!" - Grandpa

Okay I'll limit myself to just two posts today. But like I previously mentioned...I really have been brainstorming for this blog and it's taking a great deal of self restraint not to keep yapping away. Besides, I'm in the process of building my devoted fan base. Therefore I needed to post something for my visitors who could care less about anything I have to say but are spending a momentary 5 seconds scrolling for some interesting pictures. Hopefully this will be a sufficient lure for a subsequent visit.

The endearing title is a direct quote from my darling grandfather upon viewing a few pictures from my lab at school! In all honestly he may be half correct...judge for yourself. But please be honest...crazy or not it looks like a butt load of fun! So with no further ado behold the play ground of the exercise physiologists :)

Ah, microdialysis probes. How many hours of my life I have slaved away over a microscope carefully constructing perfectly profusing probes such as the ones you see here. They are carefully inserted directly beneath the skin by use of a 4 inch long spinal tap needle! Straight up!

Our next photo takes us a step we have covered the sites of the microdialysis probes with really cool scientific gadgets measuring sweat rate and skin blood flow. I love the highly technical makeshift base holding the laser doppler probes and miniature humidity chambers in place with mole know the stuff you put on blisters when hiking.

Featured next is one of my all time favorites! Please note the tubing protruding from the subjects nose. You guessed is indeed the beloved esophageal probe measuring body core temperature. Please read all directions prior to installation:

1. Length of tubing inserted through the nasal passage is to be 1/4 your body height
2. Take precaution to eat a light breakfast prior to insertion of esophageal probe as many individuals are prone to strong gag reflexes causing them to vomit.
3. Begin insertion through your preferred nostril, (right or left), tilt head back and continue to thread probe down the back of your throat.
4. It may be helpful to have a small glass of water and swallow frequently to overcome the natural tendency to gag. (it's often wise to keep a trash can near by)
5. Continue to thread probe down the esophagus until you reach your marked length. The end of the probe will be about heart level.
6. Secure probe to nose with tape to keep it from sliding further in or out and to make for lovely black mail photos.

In action on the recumbent cycle ergometer...

Yours truely modeling the latest and greatest in Go-Go-Gadget technology. This little servo-controlled hand heater powered by none other than Vidal Sassoon (quite literally...your basic hair dryer) can keep the skin temperature constant at your preferred degree!

Last but not least....drum roll please....please behold MAN VS. LOWER BODY NEGATIVE PRESSURE. Even though most of you are saying...I don't know what the crap you're talking looks cool doesn't it??? And believe me it is. This contraption was custom designed and built to apply suction to your lower extremities causing the blood to pool in your legs. If you're not careful the subject may eventually pass out. It's used to study the regulation of cardiac output, blood pressure, and heart rate responses. Please note the fancy plexiglass cover for you're viewing pleasure of some guy's hairy thighs! (no offense Dan, I'm obviously not referring to you since you shave your legs :)

I'd like to extend a special thanks to those who have volunteered their time as subjects in the lab. My sincere apologies go out to any those close friends or family members who I may have a.) caused to vomit (Spen and Steph), b.) swear my name as they lie ill on the floor in the fetal position (Lizzardo), or c.) stuck a tendon with an 18gage needle rather than the intended blood vessel. Science has benefited from your sweat, tears, and vomit!! (In my defense all three of the listed subjects were given monetary compensation for their sacrifice, not tendon boy but it wasn't that bad, he's just a bit of a cry baby, jk)


Jacqueline said...

Sorry Crystelle, but I could never be one of your subjects no matter how much it was needed for research. Good thing you have other friends who are willing to risk their lives. Somewhat j.k.

sojay said...

Very clever, Crystelle!

I can't restrain myself either, the misspellings, or rather misuse of homynyms (those are words that sound alike but have different spellings and meanings) is killing me! A few examples--adieu/ado, whit/wit. Ok, I'm done.

Carry on.

la guera salsera said...

Oh, no need for apologies, I except this type of behavior from you. I'll make the necessary changes...what a great editor you make :)

sojay said...

Aaah! Are you doing it on purpose? Except/accept??? Please, I cannot bear it.

la guera salsera said...

Um...for RUDE!!! Yes, I make spelling and gramatical errors on purpose so I can look like an idiot. That was called SARCASM in case you didn't know. I will not make the necessary change this time...besides I just realized it's a typo...I did not mean to use the word ACCEPT...I meant to use the word EXPECT...I EXPECT this type of behavior from you...sorry I'm a dyslexic typer. Okay that is all...if you point out any errors in this comment I may have to hurt you!

Sassy Rachel said...

crystelle, this is all so amazing! Holy cow, I am intrigued! very cool and I think this is all just perfect for you and something you are really enjoying...i'm so glad:)

I'm loving that you've joined the bloggin world and that I can now keep tabs on you...hahahah!!!

liz said...

well stellular, it's like i've always said..."we ARE a production company, we produce laughter." and you, munchkin-face, are no exception {or should i say, acception} haha.

love your

Spencer & Suzy said...

Oh Stelle, those pictures of arms with iodine and needles are all too familiar. Good thing you have such a steady hand! Good luck with the thesis... why is procrastinating so easy?

Steely Dan said...

I think you are funny. Does that mean we can be friends?

sojay said...

Hey! What kind of thing is that to say to your dear auntie?!

la guera salsera said...

Oh dear auntie, you know my contentious nature...why do you provoke me so? Many apologies :) I supose it's best you point out my every flaw...that way I can improve my writing.