Monday, December 14, 2009

Through my teaching experience at BYU I often find myself questioning how a number of the students in my classes

a) even got accepted to BYU, and
b) how they pass their other classes???

Let me share...

For my swimming classes the students are required to write a two page paper explaining how to do two of the four competitive strokes and also mention two drills that have helped them improve each stroke. (I did not make up with these assignments's a department course syllabus)

Anyhow these excerpts from two papers I received, my comments in red;

"Since this paper has no argument, thesis or analysis to present, we're going to assume that informal is okay, and go from there. I will now describe Freestyle and some accompanying drills, followed immediately by a repeat performance featuring the backstroke.Ready, go! ...

(He proceeds to spout off some incorrect information about Freestyle)...With the legs, one does what is called a "Scissor Kick" to propel oneself through the water... (NOOOO!!! This is probably why your swimming do not listen or implement anything I've tried to teach you. Freestyle is swam with a flutter kick! It is NOT the same thing. He concludes talking about backstroke)...

A great way to improve technique is to wait until the pushing arm has returned to one's side before lifting the other arm. It, uh, improves technique. Yup. One can also swim on one's side with the top arm to the side and the lower arm extended in front, in order to , uh, improve, uh, one's torso rotation...ability. Yes. And that is the end of the paper. The End." Holy crap kid, you're in college! I don't care if it is a paper for a half credit PE class. Please reserve verbal pauses and "..." for blogs and emails, and futhermore you have completely solidified the fact that you don't know what you're talking about! Weird. That's all I can say.

Okay, this next paper screams illiterate freshman or something? Enjoy the introduction.

"During the summers, community swimming pools are completely crowded. There are people swimming laps, leaping off diving boards, and sliding down slides. The crazy crowds die down once Fall and Winter hit; except for the few athletes that stay behind. Swimming is an addictive sport, it exercises almost every muscle in the human body when properly performed. There are four main strokes invovled: backstroke, breaststoke, butterfly, and freestlye." Um, what the crap??? I'm no english major but what the heck do crowded swimming pools and crazy crowds have to do with your butterfly technique. Ha, ha...I seriously had to re-read the intro like twice to see if I missed some type of transition or parallel.

Friday, December 4, 2009


I defend!!! Actually by the time most of you read this it will be over. I defend my master's thesis in 1 hour and yes I am slightly nervous. But extremely thrilled...there were several times when I doubted if I would ever make it to this day. I definitely took my time but none the less here I am. Hopefully I will join the ranks of young Luke Skywalker and you may shortly call me, Master Crystelle.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Newly Weds

I thought I'd post some pictures from our honey moon and other adventures lately. For those who don't know we went to the beautiful island of Kauai. Behold.

This next photo pretty much sums up the vacation... nothing better than lounging on baby floaty's at the hotel pool!

We soon became masters of the grill and enjoyed fine dining as a result!

This is me about to face a 250 ft stretch of zipline...the second of seven ziplines we did that day.

Check out Chris' action photography as he speeds down the line, ha, ha!

We had to try just about every flavor of gelato before making a decision. You will also note the lack of effort gone into doing my hair, it's useless when you get in the water every couple of hours.
We were privileged to behold the the wild life on the isle.

And guava was found in abundance out in the jungle.

We were greeted with a lovely Hawain Luau back in California upon our return home thanks to Chris' parents.

This is our old and beloved first dining room table featuring udon noodles and spinach salad. My brother and sister in law got us these awesome ramen bowls for our wedding complete with chopsticks and adorable little cherry blossom chopstick holders. YUM!

Our second weekend at home we didn't just hiked, but backpacked up Timpanogos with some of Chris' old college roommates and their wives. All in all it was pretty difficult but definitely worth it! You can't see stars like that from down in the valley.

We were also lucky enough to stumble upon some hunters and their prized mountain goat!! If you zoom in on this baby you can see the blood dripping from the goat's nose onto the hem of that dude's pants. Sweet!

We have continued our grilling tradition... a homemade fire roasted tomatoe onion soup.

A little mud mask rest and relaxation to counteract the stress of school.

That about sums things up!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Behold the Alleged Mosquito Bite!

Might I remind you I did not lay so much as a finger nail on that thing...literally!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Police Beat

I apologize I have not yet posted the picture of my allergic reaction to the West Nile assailant. And for those asking for wedding pictures I have not gotten those back yet either. Thank you for your interest. In other interesting news and for those of you who have been out of the BYU scene for a while let me fill you in on the latest Police Beat. That's right, BYU is a hub of suspicious activity and disorderly conduct so much so that it warrants a special section of the Daily Universe every Wednesday.

I will share with you the highlights from today's paper, my own commentary in red:


October 6th: A suspicious looking backpack and lunch box were reported to be on Maeser Hill. Police came, but they did not find anything.

Seriously? No, seriously?? No worries, there were only about four other reports in which the police arrived only to find no signs of anything suspicious. Perhaps the best was when a snake, thought to be a common garter snake, was spotted on a walk way on the south end of campus. There was no sign of the snake when police arrived. Who is calling and reporting such nonsense? Throw a rock at the snake and it'll slither back where it came from! Did you actually expect the snake to wait around until officers arrived? Glad the police are staying so busy.


October 6th: A bike was stolen from a woman at her home in Provo a few months ago. She found it at the Tanner Building and stole it back. She left a note for the thief to give her a call, but she did not receive one.

Ha, this not funny to anyone else? Why did she want the thief to call her?? I wouldn't give a thief my phone number.


October 4th: The Wyview Park apartments has ongoing criminal mischief under investigation. Someone keeps spreading things such as wet cat food, dish soap and peanut butter on people's doors using a toilet plunger.

How do they know they are using a toilet plunger?? Is the plunger left as well? Does the suspect keep buying new plungers every night?

Hope you enjoyed that as much as I did. Chris and I like to make up our own police beats just for fun. For example:


October 14th: A BYU student was walking home from school along 800 North. A car drove by and a passenger in the vehicle threw something out the window. The foreign projectile hit the BYU student in the face. When officers arrived on scene the car was not to be found. The missile was believed to be a Skittle. No injuries were sustained by the victim of the drive by.

Oh wait...that really happened!! Who reports a drive by Skittling??

September 5th: A student's bike was stolen from the RB bike racks. The student reportedly locked his bike up at the end of April before leaving to do summer sales in California. When the student returned to school in September the bike was not to be found.

Never mind, we don't have to make this stuff up...people are actually that stupid. This was actually from one of the newspapers as well. Yo dummy, you're bike was probably impounded by the school. You can't leave your bike for 4 months and expect it to be waiting for you when you get back!

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Sweet Nectar

For those of you who may not know, I have some type of strange succulent sweet nectar flowing through my veins. Seriously folks, where ere there be a mosquito he will find me. When no one else gets any mosquito bites in the evening I usually get about five.

So anyway, two days before my bridals I was accosted by my arch enemy... the mosquito. I vowed not to give that mosquito the satisfaction of watching me scratch that bite. It took every ounce of self restraint, but knowing my pictures were up and coming I did not scratch.

Ironically when I woke up in the morning this is what I found. The fruits of my efforts had NOT been rewarded!!

(picture coming)

All I have to say is Benadryl. And being doped up on that for a day wasn't a pretty site either.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009


Sorry I've been MIA forever and then some. I've been busy planning my wedding and trying to keep my head above water :) Here is a peak at some of my bridals. Stay tuned for my monster mosquito bite!

The soft smile

Out in nature...
that shot was actually taken at the edge of a parking lot and I'm pretty much standing on a couple of beer cans.

Off with the shoes!

The bouquet I kept fretting over.

I like to call this the Jane Austin backdrop.


Rustic fence post.

Laughing hysterically...when I did that the photographer said, "Woah, do that scrunchy thing with your nose again." (Chris' favorite picture)

Toe shot.
My mother said, "good thing your toes were done", ha, ha... as if it was by accident.
Also I was thrilled with the purchase of my shoes for only $16 at Target!

Monday, May 25, 2009


Hey friends,
Me and Chris posed as the "models" for a photography class. For those who know, the girl teaching it was actually an old friend of some of the Ivy's from Helaman Halls. You can check out our pictures on her blog here.

I was so impressed with Chris. Without me even asking he dropped off his shirts to the dry cleaners to be starched and pressed, he got a hair cut, he showed up on time, and didn't complain about having his picture taken! Having grown up with three brothers I am still in shock!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Back From the Surgeon and Tonsil Free

This is me in all my glory post surgery.

I was very anxious to bring you pictures of my new throat! So don't scroll down if you don't want to see. But you can definitely read my run down of the surgery.

I arrived at the surgical center nice and early at 8am. After some paper work I stripped down to my skiv-vies...(cotton panties) and put on my XXXL hospital gown. I have to say it was a little exciting never having had surgery before...but at the same time I was scared. I didn't let myself dwell on it too much. The nurse didn't get a good stick in my arm the first time so re stuck my hand. She felt so bad about it but it was no big deal to me. It felt like a full circle moment after all that I've put my research subjects a urine sample, sticking their arm a few times, making them take their clothes off and run around in spandex shorts.

After a few minutes Chris said goodbye and the anesthesiologist and scrub nurse wheeled me down the hall. It felt just like eyes got a little moist leaving Chris but I held it together. The operating room was HUGE, but the little operating table was narrow. I had to fold my arms across my stomach or they would fall off the sides of the table! I wonder how anyone bigger than me would lay on the table? It was also very cold.

The anesthesiologist was very nice and social. The surgeon was kinda anti-social...not mean, but just interested in getting down to business. That's okay, I myself am not always a people person...I understand. They first put some lidocaine in my IV to numb my didn't work very well because when he put the other drugs in my arm hurt so bad! I was unaware that happened but seriously the pain was quite intense. They told me to count down from 10 and see how far I got. I thought to myself, "I better count slow because it doesn't seem like anything is happening". I think I got to 5...that stuff is amazing!

After the surgery and 45 minutes into recovery I woke up. My eye lids felt very heavy and I was having a hard time opening them. I thought I had a down blanket over me but it was really this cool blanket that looked like large air packing space fillers you put in boxes you're shipping. The blanket was being filled with warm air...most excellent. I wouldn't mind having one of those on my bed at home. Super light weight but still warm and toasty!!

For some reason the meds made me a bit emotional. As soon as the nurse left my side I started with the erratic breathing that accompanies uncontrollable crying. There were no tears but it took me a while to calm myself down. I kept asking myself, "Why are you crying? You're not even in pain, you're totally fine". I felt like I was being a big baby and I did not want to be that weird scared hysteric patient. (I've broken down in uncontrollable sobbing about 8 times today...poor Chris) The doctor came and asked me how I was doing and I asked him two questions:

1. Was I a good patient? I think this caught him off guard and somewhat strange. In retrospect I guess it is?? (I'm sure he'd lie to me even if I wasn't but for some reason this is important to me. It makes me feel sensible and tough.)

2. Did you remove my adenoids? Yes, he did. He said they were a bit scarred up, the left one especially! He asked if the left tonsil usually swelled up more than the right? Why yes, this was indeed the case. In loving memory of my golf ball sized tonsils I have re posted my first concomitant infection of Step Throat and Mono from Nov 07, you'll see what I mean...check out ol' lefty.

They finally brought Chris back it was so good to see him. He was such a sweetheart. He spoon fed me a snack pack chocolate pudding cup and refilled my ice water about seven times. I think it took me about twenty minutes to eat that little pudding.

I've been feeling pretty good today Unfortunately all the nurses kept telling me I can expect to feel progressively worse as the days go by up until about day 5. Wah! I'm scared to go to bed tonight. The meds are however making me nauseous and I ending up throwing up about a liter of ice water this afternoon. Since I had drank so much water there was no acidity and it didn't hurt my throat at all!

That's it for now...except for something weird happened. Check out the picture when I just got home from the clinic. See my uvula? Now check out the picture I just took several hours later in the evening...I was searching frantically for my uvula in the mirror...I couldn't find it!! Then I realized it is the massive slug like protuberance slowly inflating in my throat!!! It has for some reason it has bloated to about 4-5 times it's original size! Enjoy or don't enjoy the pictures. Scroll down...

Okay in loving memory of my blasted tonsils behold the reason I got them removed! This was actually taken in like Jan/Feb '08...the second attack. Just some virus following the first mono/strep incidence.

This is right after I got home from the clinic around noon today. Please note my adorable little uvula hanging down in the middle of the know, your hangy down ball thingy. Those massive holes to either side are the void of my tonsils and adenoids.

Okay not check out those red dots spots above my large holes...they have gotten increasingly red. I think maybe that's where he gave me shots of lidocaine?? I really have no idea. Now check out my nasty slug of a uvula! I can't even locate the bottom of it looking in the mirror!! I hope I don't suffocate tonight. Pretty gruesome eh? I'll keep you updated.

However I have to admit it's pretty nice being spoon fed and tucked into bed like a baby my sweet fiance!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Going Under the Knife and Wedding Plan Updates


I'm getting my tonsils removed tomorrow morning. Yes, I am nervous...not for the procedure but for the ensuing pain to follow. Actually I'm quite curious about the surgery. I wish there was some way I could consciously watch the procedure but still be under the magnificent powers of general anesthesia. Seriously, aren't you curious as to what your removed tonsils and adenoids look like? I am. If I could, I'd keep them in a jar next to my wisdom teeth. Maybe I should incinerate them and keep the ashes...ha, ha. JK

And now I shall quote directly from the pre-operative information sheet. (okay not directly because I don't have it with me at the moment...I'll paraphrase)

Expect a sharp down hill spiral in you recovery 3-4 days following the surgery. It will feel like someone has taken a sharp knife to the back of your throat, oh wait...WE DID. You may also experience a foul odor and taste accompanying your agonizing pain. Your attempts to shut out the stench with Listerine shall be futile as the swift burn to your open wounds will be more than mere mortals can endure...don't plan on kissing your fiance for at least a week :(

Sound like fun?? Yeah I didn't think STOP telling me it's going to be awesome because I can eat ice cream. Guess what, I can already eat ice cream, I've been eating it since I was two! Besides, I getting married in August and the last thing I want on my conscious is a half gallon of rocky road ice cream!


Which leads me to wedding plans. Planning a wedding is NOT fun!

a) be more exact the deadline of all deadlines August 15th! Obviously I am anxious to get married. But all the stuff I have to do before then feels like an 18 credit semester of marriage prep!

b) Planning a wedding might be fun...but planning a wedding on a budget is not fun! It's hard.

c) Dress shopping is the worst! You know when you go shopping for something specific like a brown knit vest to go over your blue and white striped button up shirt? Do you think you're going to find exactly what you're looking for?'s a universal law of shopping! Of course you will find many other great things but not what you're looking for...and if by chance you get lucky you will realize it's $150.00 at Banana Republic, all for a dumb vest! Yeah, that's what dress shopping feels like...I have to buy a white dress that I'm supposed to look exquisite in! So far it ain't happening.

But I don't want to be a total will make Chris feel bad, and probably my mom too. We have pinned down the location of our reception, our photographer, and our honey moon destination. So some progress is better than none right! Besides, I'm a self proclaimed procrastinator so I'm sure it'll all come together in the end.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

My boyfriend bought me a ring!

Yes, I am slacker. Or as Yoda would say...slacker I am. The rumors are true I am officially engaged. It is a miracle even I thought would never happen :) ...and yes, to the very same boyfriend who did not care for my body spray.

Background deets on the fiance:

For those who don't know I met Chris in my research lab. He came in to earn $50 by sacrificing his body to science. Needless to say he thought I was totally cute from the start. As I was verbally encouraging Chris to run through the next stage of his VO2 max test one of the Doctoral students said, "yeah, if you make it to the next stage Crystelle will go on a date with you". I started blushing when I glanced over at Chris and he pretended to start running faster in order to secure a date with me. I was totally embarrassed!! Here I was trying to act all professional and scientific like and it was being turned into some flirt fest!

Well, shortly after this incidence Chris approached my friend Stephanie and told her he was interested in asking me out. Stephanie agreed to "feel out the situation"...which just meant she'd just ask me if I was interested. Seriously, boys are so naive.

To be honest I was having a bit of a stress disorder at this time in my life...please see my previous post on trench mouth for details. I wasn't opposed to going out, it was just bad timing. I was slaving like 14 hours a day in the lab and having sporadic emotional break downs. But being a 25 year old single co-ed at BYU did I really have a choice?? So Stephanie gave Chris the green light.

On Chris's next visit to the lab he attempted to strike up a conversation with me about snow boarding. I was pretty sure he wanted to ask me out but I was just not feeling it at the moment. So I played the avoidance card. I started acting distracted and busy with my research. Yeah, he basically didn't think I was very cool at this point...and lets be honest I wasn't.

Christmas break came and went and for whatever reason when we got back to school Chris still wanted to ask me out! He started to gmail chat with my friend Steph one day as I was working in the lab. He told Stephanie he's like to take me snow shoeing. I told Stephanie to tell Chris, "she'd probably really like that." I proceeded to direct the conversation from Stephanie's end un-beknown to Chris. By the end of the conversation I had set of a lovely double date with my best friend and knew Chris would be calling to ask me out later that day. Go me! I must say he was quite fooled by my acting skills as he called later that day I pretended to be totally in the dark.

So there you have it. We went snow shoeing on our first was awesome. The only weird thing was he was still my research subject. When he came into the lab three days after our first date I had to ask him to take his shirt off and provide me with a small urine sample in order to ensure his hydration status! Don't worry, I played it off very professionally. From then on we went on a couple more dates spaced a few days apart. Chris finished my research study and then kept frequenting the lab to say hi. We were pretty much inseparable by the fourth date.

Chris proposed by sending me on a totally cute little scavenger hunt. I was supposed to meet him at his apartment for dinner but instead I found his roommate with a rose and a message leading me to the research lab where we first met. Once I got the rose I knew Chris was proposing. After all we had already picked out a ring together, I caught him in the act of sneaking my father's phone number, and I knew he was chomping at the bit to pop the question. I proceeded over to the research lab where I met my roommate Annie with another rose and clue. Her note sent me to the grocery store as it holds some sentimental value for our early courtship...Chris being sick...then me being sick...then Chris being sick again...then me being sick again. Stephanie and her husband met me by the cough syrup.

You may ask yourself what I was thinking at this point. It was like I was being proposed to in slow was happening but very slowly!! I had a 10 minute commute between destinations and still no Chris or ring! The nerves finally got to me and I had stop and use the restroom at Macey's. Not because I had to go to the bathroom...just out of fear I might wet my pants when I finally saw Chris and he got down on one knee.

The next destination was Goodwood BBQ, the location of our first date. Here I was given the clue to my final location. Southfork park up Provo Canyon. We had gone snow shoeing there on Valentines day and it is serenely located in the mountains. As I was driving up the canyon I kept thinking:

"This is so surreal, what should I be doing? Should I be crying? Perhaps it's a little premature for that and I don't want to force the tears, I think those should come naturally. Well, what should I be listening to? Surely not Lady Gaga...she will NOT be the soundtrack to my engagement!"

Well after changing the radio station about 15 times I decided Lady Gaga WAS the soundtrack to my engagement because there was nothing else worth listening to and I felt awkward turning the radio off. Luckily half way up the canyon Beyonce's new song Halo came on and then the radio cut out.

Finally I turned into the parking lot of Southfork. I was frantically searching for his car or perhaps a candle lit dinner? I found neither but finally spotted a lone ranger standing by the side of the road. It was Chris, I pulled over and gave him a hug. He took me on a little walk through the park to a little footbridge where a bouquet of flowers awaited me with one more card. As I read thought it the water works started and when I finished Chris got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. It was totally sweet. We relished the moment with hot chocolate and a blanket in the grass. It was perfect.

Behold the Ring:

So there you go. Sorry this was a very long post I will try to frequent some shorter nonsense in the near future. Sonja's got the wheels a turning in my head from all her postage.

Friday, February 20, 2009

My Boyfriend Thinks I Stink

This is my newest favorite scent from Bath & Body Works...Black Amethyst...check it out.

Okay people, we have a topic to address. Let me fill you in on the situation...

As some of you know I have been dating a really great guy as of late. Last night, as we were on our way out, I mentioned that he smelled really good. I was quite taken back when he quickly responded with a slight tone of concern, "Oh, is it my shampoo or cologne? Is it too strong? I hate when smells are too strong." To which I responded, " Well, without sniffing you like a dog I'm not sure that I can distinguish if it's your shampoo or cologne. And I wouldn't have complimented you if I thought it was too's good".

Then I secretly had a waive of concern flood my thoughts...

Uh, I can barely catch a whiff of Chris unless I take a deep breath...I'm sure he used like one spritz of cologne at most, perhaps even a half spritz if that's possible. When I use body spray or perfume I use at a minimum three pumps...perhaps more. I mean especially body spray which is less concentrated than perfume...let's be honest, if I use only one pump, within two hours I don't think any one's going to smell anything. If Chris is afraid he smells too strongly I've definitely far surpassed a faint scent. I like people to catch a whiff when in a relatively close proximity without having to give me a close and lingering embrace. Anyhow, is Chris totally over powered when I wear perfume?

A second hint of evidence:
Once we arrived at my friend Stephanie's house the topic of conversation again turned to smells. Chris noted that he is particularly sensitive to smells especially as of late, (he's been sick). So much so that the box of dryer sheets lingering in his closet had to be removed from his bedroom in order to avoid induction of the gag reflex.

Hmmm...I'm thinking I wear a little too much scent for his taste. As I reflected more on the topic I do recall finding it odd that Chris has never told me I smelled good??? Not to be conceded but I really do like my body spray and pride myself on smelling good.

Well, if you know me at all you can probably guess what came next...that's right people, rarely can I avoid a good and pressing CONFRONTATION. So I asked Chris last night, "So I wear too much perfume? I mean, does it totally overpower you?" There was no need for a verbal response because the pained wince upon his face said it all! And a confession soon followed, "Sorry, don't hate me but I really don't like any of your body sprays".

Wow, uh...thanks for tip toeing around the issue! Jk...naturally I cannot be offended. I mean seriously, Chris can't help the fact that he is repulsed by my scent, just like I can't force myself to laugh at something that's not funny. I'm more just super bummed and slightly embarrassed. Here I am trying to allure my boyfriend by my sweet smelling nectar and now I'm having visuals of him running home to shower and strip himself of his contaminated clothing. It's like I've been hosing myself down with insect repellent before we go on a date! I mean seriously...he does NOT like the way I smell.

Not a big deal...except for the fact I really like the way I smell and I don't want to give it up! Furthermore I am now feeling rather self conscious...does he like the way I dress? What about my make-up? Are my eyebrows plucked too thin? Does this shirt accentuate my luv handles? Do I smack my food when I eat? Do you like my hair color? Do you the way I style my hair?

Obviously I'm going a little overboard...I mean, he must like something about me right? After all it was him who asked me out first!

Well, we're going to go scent shopping together to see if we can't find something we both like. I'm not too optimistic but I'll let you know how it goes. In a form of subtle rebellion and retaliation I dowsed myself in my favorite scent before heading to the dance last night and was not disappointed to receive many compliments :)

Has this or anything similar happened to any of you? If so how did you resolve your dilemma? Oh, and do any of you like Sensual Amber from Bath & Body Works?? Because I love that smell and it's perhaps the one Chris hates most.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

One more thing...

I forgot a few of my quirks:

I don't like drinking water out of a mug. literally doesn't taste as good. This goes the opposite direction as well, hot chocolate out of a plastic cup...I don't know if I've tried it but I don't think I want to!

Also can we address picky eaters? This is a definite pet peeve of mine...don't like them. And when people won't try new foods! Don't get me started...buck up and take it like a man! How do you know you don't like it if you're not willing to give it a try. Plus, isn't curiosity killing you? It's not like I'm asking you to eat something off fear factor that still has a beating heart! Sheesh!!

Okay, that concludes this session.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Make-up, hair, the whole nine yards.

Okay, once again my aunt's blog has led me to post...I can't refrain from expressing my view points on the a fore mentioned daily rituals imposed and demanded of by society.

The question of interest was, "I decided that if I feel like I look better with it on--and I must since I wear it when I dress up--why would I not want to try and look better all the time?

I'll tell you why, it's a pain in the butt to look your best all the time. It's TIME consuming. For any of my male readers...(assuming I have any)...let me list for you the crap a girl must go through to always be looking her best.

Make-up, hair (this includes wash, blow dry, and straighten/curl), and the whole nine yard. Let me expound on the whole nine yards....plucking your eye brows on a daily basis, shaving your legs, pits, and other area when necessitated by bathing suits, picking out clothes, picking out accessories...I'm sure there are things I'm forgetting.

All this and we haven't even discussed "fat days". Fat days are an unexplainable phenomenon that happens quite frequently. Let me explain...that oh so flattering and adorable outfit you wore two weeks ago and planned to wear again for church this morning is suddenly making you look like a frumpy cow!!! What gives??? Maybe if you just change your top...okay that didn't work but six shirts later you found one that looks decent. But now your skirt doesn't really go with it. Then we have the question of boots or heels? Brown or cream socks, nylons or no nylons, big or small earrings, belt or no belt, vest or no vest, the list is almost indefinite and now you must decide to pull your hair back, wear it curly or straight, head band or no head band...I'm exhausted just typing about it all!

Can you even imagine what my room looks like now?? But there is no time to pick up because I've already made myself late to whatever function I was getting ready for! And by the time I come home from dancing at 1 am I am much too tired to hang up the massacre of clothes on my bed. Thus I gather them in my arms and plop them on the floor. I would pick them up in the morning but I've already hit the snooze three times and have about T-2 seconds to get my butt to school! Which leads me to the fact I clean my room at least once or twice a week but it always looks like a mess?

Stupid Oprah!! That's right, I watched an episode a few years ago in which Oprah said you have to always look your best. Whether you're running to the grocery store for a nasal decongestant or going out on the town because you never know when you're going to meet "Mr. Right". Well guess what Big O., Mr. Right ain't right unless he loves me when I look like butt too! Okay, I realize I'm getting carried away. That is all.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Idiosyncrasies and the Big 30

In reviewing my blogging history I noted this is officially my 30th post!! Wow, that seems like of lot of nonsense I've published. Anyhow the inspiration for this post came from my aunt's new blog in which she recently posted on her OCD idiosyncrasies regarding her hygienic behavior. Another great feature is her post on the physiological under pinnings of the Japanese Body Type. I highly recommend this read to everyone!!

Any who...I thought I'd fill you in on some of my own personal idiosyncrasies...for your reading pleasure, and also because I know they will drive my aunt crazy! Personally I find this type of information fascinating...(Steve, I would thoroughly enjoy reading about your OCD behavior). Okay, here we go...

1. I floss my teeth before I brush...I think I used to be the opposite but I think it makes sense this way. I like to get the gunk out from between and then clean everything out. I don't want anything flinging off the floss into my freshly brushed mouth! Think about it...

2. I prefer to rinse with warm water when brushing my teeth. That's right, warm water. I'll admit there was a time in my life when such a thought revolted me! But out of curiosity I had to try it. Yes, there is a certain minty freshness that accompanies a cold water rinse. But there is less of a sting and no sensitivity to luke warm water! Yummy!

3. In response to Sonja's post...I don't think I have a set order when it comes to washing the face and brushing the teeth.

4. I definitely DON'T wash my hair every day. Well, sometimes I do...and I will admit I love having freshly washed hair. But it's mega booty work...and not always practical. Monday, that's a definite NO. First of all you just washed your hair on Sunday, and because it's the day of rest and it's not like it got sweaty! Depending on what you decide to do Monday that may extend to Tuesday as well. Lest you think I'm a wretched dirty mongrel by now I will inform you I still shower my body, wash my face twice a day, wear clean clothes, and wear deodorant. And I've become quite obsessed with always washing my feet in the bathtub before slipping into my sheets.

Besides, there is nothing better than being complimented on "left overs". That's what I call my hair the second and third day out. Luckily I've been blessed with non greasy hair. In fact sometimes I prefer day 2 to day 1...a little less frizzy, a little more sheen giving it that healthy glow :) Okay...I could go on...I'll refrain for now.

5. Some people in my family prefer left over dinner for breakfast...we're talking reheat a piece of lasagna or how bout some cold salmon, sushi, and soy sauce! Let me just say, this does NOT bode well with me. There are just some foods not meant for human consumption that early in the morning.

6. Cereal must be consumed as soon as milk is poured onto it.

7. Salads that have been mixed with dressing are NOT to be saved and eaten as left overs! SICK...wilted lettuce is disgusting. When ordering a salad at Cafe Rio I advise you to only pour dressing on half the lettuce or else eat all the lettuce and take the rice, beans, and meat home as left overs...or just eat the whole thing at once. (depends if you want to feel completely over indulgent and sick after you eat?) I thought of the soggy tortilla is also a little revolting but still pretty tasty when reheated.

8. The smell of left overs in the car is enough to invoke the gag reflex...(yes, I know one person who actually enjoys this smell!) This is actually a strange phenomenon...I mean the smell of food cooking over the open flame of a stove or wafting out of the oven is inviting. But opening the fridge or the car door after a dinner and a movie is just plain wrong!

9. Feet are dirty. Indeed some may say I have a phobia of feet...I would disagree. If you would like to massage or touch my my guest, I find this quite enjoyable. But PLEASE do not expect me to reciprocate! I would appreciate if you kept your nasty toes to yourself. Okay, under certain circumstances I may make exceptions...if you have just washed your feet, you appear to be free of any type of toe nail fungi and athletes foot, no bunions or corns, or open sores, I may consider touching your feet. If you are a baby or my niece or nephew I may even LOVE your tiny soft feet. If you are my brother I will NEVER touch your feet!

10. I prefer my hot apple pie, brownies, and warm cookies not to touch my ice cream. It detracts from the warmth and makes them soggy. I do however like Oreo's dipped in milk, and milk on the side of brownies and hot cookies. Root beer floats are usually better separate as well. I enjoy how the root beer crystallizes on the ice cream...but that murky root beer once the ice cream is gone!!! SICK!

Okay, this list could go on indefinitely...and I'm not sure I'm actually entertaining anyone but myself. If you have any oddities of your own, please do share!

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

A Lack of Energy

Do you ever just lack the energy to do instead you sit around and do nothing?

For instance I am stuck in a chair right now in my office because I lack the energy to brave the mile long walk to my car in the snow. And once I arrive at my car, because I have lacked the energy to go buy a snow brush, (who knows where the one from last winter went?? it will most likely show up sometime along with three others and then I'll have four when all I need is one!!), I will have to scrape my car off with my arm...and undoubtedly will get snow up my jacket sleeve. Then I will have to wait for twenty minutes for the heater in my car to start working. And after driving in second gear all the way out to north/west Orem (I like to remind people I live in an entirely different city!) because the roads are so slick, and the Smurf mobile likes to fishtail, I will arrive at my home 40 minutes later. Upon arrival I will have to search the streets for a suitable parking spot, one I can assuredly not get stuck in over night. Then I'll have to muster up the will to leave the warm vehicle and brave to cold icy sidewalks. After lugging all my bags into the house i'll stand face to face with the lack of energy to make dinner...

And that is why I continue to waste time sitting here...because the alternative...although inevitable, does not sound very inviting.

This is the very same dilemma I face every night as I have to get ready to go to bed. I can't even bare to outline all the steps I must follow before flopping my head onto my pillow. Which is why I stay up too late night after night and feel exhausted the next day when I have to get up early.

Someone help me break free of the insanity!!! :)