Why I wear BIG earrings

Due to all the heckiling and commentary I recieve...I thought I'd defend my position.

Why I wear BIG earrings:

1. They’re sexy!!
2. They give the illusion you are a little more put together than you actually are. This is because earrings are like icing on a cake…not only did that girl get dressed, but she took the time to coordinate an actual outfit, as evidenced by accessories. (Little do they know I haven’t washed my hair in three days!)
3. I’ve gotten used to it and quite frankly I feel a little naked without them.
4. I’ve inherited an abnormally large head from my Japanese heritage, (this has been confirmed by several loved ones…yeah, my family is real sensitive like that :) Thus I have a special need to wear large earrings which help dwarf my head size closer to that of an average human being.
5. Sometimes I like to pretend I’m high maintenance, (then I remember I live paycheck to paycheck as a part time PE teacher)
6. People notice them, and I freely admit I love to be the center of attention.
7. They can dress up any outfit…literally, jeans, t-shirts, sweats, the possibilities are endless.
8. They make great souvenirs.
9. Bigger is better!
10. They exude confidence. Whether or not I’m lacking self esteem, other people are inevitable thinking…wow, that girl’s earring’s are ridiculously large, what makes her think she can pull that off? She must be really confident. Okay, they're probably really thinking...that would really hurt if one of those got snagged on her backpack and ripped through her earlobe...but what can I say??? I live on the edge!

Well folks, that about sums it up, if you have any further questions about my personal mannerisms, habits, quirks, or just life with an abnormally large head feel free to ask.